Uninvited: What to Do When a Wedding Crasher Shows Up

Let’s set the scene: You’ve spent months planning your perfect day. The seating chart is locked in, the signature cocktails are flowing, and your guests are living their best lives on the dance floor. Then... someone you don’t recognize is helping themselves to the cake, doing the Cupid Shuffle, and sipping on the open bar like they belong.

Yep. You’ve got a wedding crasher.

While it might sound like a movie plot (hello, Vince Vaughn), wedding crashers are a very real thing. And whether it’s a distant cousin who wasn’t technically invited, a friend’s plus-one gone rogue, or a total stranger who wandered in from the hotel lobby—knowing how to prevent and handle a crasher situation can save you stress, awkwardness, and a few champagne toasts.

Let’s break down what you need to know—and what to do if it happens.

🚫 What Is a Wedding Crasher, Really?

A wedding crasher is anyone who shows up to your wedding uninvited and unaccounted for. They didn’t RSVP. They’re not on your guest list. And they’re probably not supposed to be holding a plate of hors d'oeuvres at your cocktail hour.

Now, not all crashers are ill-intentioned. Some are just misinformed. Others are curious, or assume a plus-one includes their best friend from college. But some are, unfortunately, intentional party-hoppers looking for free food and fun.

Either way, it’s your day—and you deserve to be surrounded by the people who are meant to be there.

🕵️‍♀️ How to Spot a Crasher

Most crashers blend in just enough to go unnoticed for a while. But here are a few red flags to keep an eye out for:

• They avoid eye contact or can’t answer “How do you know the couple?”

• No one seems to recognize them—not even your guests.

• They hover near the bar, buffet, or dance floor but don’t engage with anyone.

• They're wearing something wildly off-theme or informal.

You may not even be the one to spot them (and honestly, on your wedding day, I hope you’re too busy enjoying yourself). But someone—your planner, venue staff, or guests—probably will.

🛡️ How to Prevent Wedding Crashers

Have a Guest List at Check-In

If you're having a larger wedding, consider having a check-in station or greeter at the entrance with a copy of your guest list. This small touch makes a big difference and adds a layer of control without feeling overly formal.

Use Assigned Seating

It’s harder for uninvited guests to slip in unnoticed when every name has a seat and every seat has a name.

Inform Your Vendors

Make sure your planner, photographer, DJ, and catering team know to keep an eye out for unfamiliar faces or strange behavior. They’re your behind-the-scenes team and often spot things before anyone else.

Limit Open Access

If your venue is public or connected to another event space (like a hotel), ask about security or signage to direct only your guests to your wedding.

😬 What to Do If a Crasher Shows Up

Stay Calm.

First and foremost, don’t panic. Most crashers are more awkward than dangerous.

Let Your Planner or Venue Handle It.

This is not your problem to solve. A good planner will discreetly confirm the person isn’t on the guest list and ask them to leave without causing a scene.

Protect Your Vibe.

If it’s someone you do recognize but know wasn’t invited (like a dramatic extended relative), let someone else (planner, maid of honor, venue staff) do the talking. Boundaries matter.

💡 Real Talk: It's Your Day

Here’s the thing: your wedding is a celebration of your love story—not an open invitation to anyone who wants to tag along. Don’t feel bad about keeping your circle intentional. You’ve invested time, money, and heart into this day. You get to protect it.

And if you're reading this while knee-deep in planning, wondering how to stay ahead of all the unknowns—I've got something for you.

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About the Author

This post was brought to you by Sarah Lizabeth—a wedding planner, educator, and storyteller on a mission to change the narrative of the wedding industry. With two decades of experience and a heart for service, Sarah is redefining what it means to plan a wedding by helping couples focus on what truly matters: connection, clarity, and a celebration that reflects their real love story.

INSTA: @wedplanpro